Europe!

How blessed by God I am! We had signed up to go on a Mission Awareness Encounter ( a tour of European missions and missionaries) with our District Superintendent, Brother Bill Leach. We were planning on using tax refund money for the trip, but we ended up using it on other things, some needful and some not, to be honest. As time wore on, we knew we would not have the money to go. Our finances were tight all summer, I couldn’t manage to save a single penny. On top of that we had a wedding to go to a week before that. We had planned on going to the wedding in Omaha, staying with family in Minnesota for a week and then we hoped to fly from Minneapolis to Detroit to meet the team. When we got home we would fly back to get our kids from their grandparents’ house and drive home.

So, we came to the conclusion that as much as we wanted to go, that it wasn’t going to work out. We were ok with that, too. I was surprised by peace about it. I called Lisa Nagle, Bro. Leach’s secretary (and a fabulous one at that) and told her our situation. To make a long story short, Brother Leach and Lisa worked to raise our funds and change our flights so we could fly from Minneapolis and meet the team in Amsterdam! And then, people started giving us a few dollars here and there (Evangel Life Assembly of God in Bad Axe gave us a very nice check) and soon we had spending money, too! Chris’ parents paid our way to the wedding. We couldn’t have asked for more. God blessed us richly.

We thank Mount Hope, Evangel Life, and the others who gave to our trip. We truly would not have gone without you!

It was an amazing trip. We learned about Europe’s background and current situation as relates to religion. I never realized how hard the ground is. It seems that people are either Atheists or Catholics who are not practicing most of the time. They do not see the need for God at this time. It is harder to evangelize there than the third world countries that we usually focus on with missions. Kudos to those who serve there for their faithfulness and tenacity.

We had lots of history lessons in order to see the background and I loved it! We got to see gorgeous castles, churches and many, many historical sights like Waterloo and Battle of the Bulge.

I pray that the district is able to this again next year and that many people will go. It was definitely an eye opener. It was great to spend a week so close to our district superintendent, too. He is an inspired man of God. I am so happy that I am in this district that is led by a man in tune with God and creative in his plans.

I think one thing I learned about myself on this trip is that I need to be more active. I was very tired (still am) as I traipsed from place to place, but I survived. There is energy in doing. What I am trying to say is that I am far too lazy at home. I have an ache or pain and I sit down to rest, but the more I rest, the lazier I get. I need to get going, have a plan of action, work for God, even if it’s only in my home. I feel energized when I have a task to complete. I usually push myself too hard to get the task of say, packing for a trip, completed and then end up sick. I don’t need to push quite that hard, but at the same time if I didn’t go from lazy to crazy, but rather from working normally to working on packing, I would not be so apt to get sick because I am unused to the work.

I also need to work on finding ways to relieve my stress. Lately I have really been feeling stress in my stomach. I feel my stomach roiling. If I don’t have an ulcer yet, I’m bound to get one going on like this. I need to find the best way to rest in God for myself.

Another thing I need to focus on is discipline. I need to continue and strengthen my prayer discipline and I need a schedule to keep myself on task.

I also need to figure out where my place of ministry should be. I feel a morphing coming. I am becoming more of what God wants me to become as I shed the weight of past hurt and unforgiveness. I can’t wait to see what God has in store for me. Today I feel like I could do anything! And I can, “do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13 NKJ

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Michigan District Council

What a great District Council we had this year! Chris and I were both tremendously blessed! We were able to stay 3 nights! That with the new schedule of Monday –Wednesday instead of Tuesday – Thursday, allowed us to stay for the ordination service and the Thursday Leadership Seminar. I love the new schedule and I hope it is permanent. (Hint, hint to anyone in the district office.)

We went on Monday because I was on Teller Committee II and there was a meeting that afternoon. I was so excited and I enjoyed it, too. There were a few things I would have changed with that, though. We were in a prayer room and the lighting wasn’t too good. Also, we were in the same prayer room as the intercessors, which was unfortunate because while I was in there, I couldn’t hear what was going on in the meeting. The speakers had been turned off for the intercessors. So as far as resolutions 1-7, I have no clue how they went or what was discussed.

We didn’t go to the Monday evening banquet. Mostly because our kids came with us, and the banquet we attended a couple of years ago was a loud, cramped affair. I don’t think it was this year, but we didn’t realize it wouldn’t be. I’m glad we didn’t go because we had fun as a family and took it easy before the meetings on Tuesday. We did a little shopping (and VERY little buying) at a posh shopping center.

We were really built up during D.C. I got up and spoke in opposition of resolution 11?. It basically said that instead of ministers having to give 85% of their tithe from both ministerial and secular income to the district, we should change it to 85% of ministerial income only. The ministers would then be free to tithe the other to their church. I do see where this view is coming from. A lot of the pastors of small churches pay the church bills out of their own pocket and receive little to no pay from the church. It is a hard place to be. Chris and I have never been in that bad of a situation, but we do have a VERY limited income. It is hard to make ends meet and to be constantly worried about where the money will come from to pay this or that or just to make life a little enjoyable for our kids. I in no way mean to disrespect these hard working pastors.

There had been a very similar resolution two years ago and Pastor Dave Williams from Mount Hope Church had suggested we tithe 10% each to both our church and the district. We had a conversation going on a forum before DC about the resolution and that was his suggestion to all of us, I believe. Anyway, Chris and I took it to heart and decided to do it. Our church had been receiving our tithe back from the district for the church. That is a thing they will do under special circumstances and for a short period of time. We had run out of time and the church was feeling the crunch. As a church, we have been blessed in so many ways since then. Of course we were before then as well, but we haven’t been so close to financial ruin since then. We just recently bought a new lawn mower with money God provided. As for Chris and I, we have our ups and downs. We are not great steward of our finances. We find that finances are a weak area and we are constantly trying to keep on top of them and be good stewards and grow in this way. It is difficult with little income, though. At the beginning of this year, another church in our section has come along beside us and is supplementing Chris and I’s income with over 50% more than we were receiving! Praise the Lord! I truly believe that if we had not been faithful in tithing extra (giving a sacrificial offering) we wouldn’t be receiving this blessing now.

So, that is basically what I stood up and said. I thought maybe my personal story of provision would show that giving extra tithe to the district brought blessing to us, while when we gave the minimum, we struggled. I don’t believe we should change it.
We ended up sending the issue for more research on how it would affect the district financially. Having more exact numbers would be a good thing, but I will still vote against it the next time it comes up.

Well, there were some who came and thanked me for saying what I did. I give the glory to God though, because I didn’t want to go up there. It makes a person very nervous to stand up in front of all your colleagues and say what’s on your mind. You are putting yourself out there hoping no feels bad by what you say if you are disagreeing with them and hoping you say what God wants you to say without stumbling all over your words. The thanks built me up though. They made me see that I do have value to God and others. I hope to remember these words of thanks on the days when I feel useless. That is mostly why I am writing them down. What really shocked me were the thanks from the District Superintendent and others in the district office. A very prominent pastor of a large church told Chris and I that we amazed him! I didn’t know what to say to that, as we are amazed by the Godly ministry that has grown from his intimate relationship with God. That we should amaze him just floored us. I could only say, “whatever!” I know, great response, eh?

We also had lunch with the pastors from Bad Axe and had a great time with them. Later, the pastor’s wife and I had our complimentary spa treatments together, as well. We are hoping to get together once a month for lunch. I would love to have a friend nearby. They have been through a lot lately. Their son died about a year ago in Iraq. I can’t imagine how that feels. I also had a great conversation with Mary Beth. I told her about our Ella difficulties and she prayed with me about them and for our ministry. It was a great little chat! All of that was going on while I should have been at the Leadership Seminar. I missed about half of it, but I was where I needed to be.

We also go to have dinner and ice cream with another couple. She is in a pastor’s wives yahoo group I’m in. He was making us laugh too hard during the first business session. We had a great time! I hope we get to do it again sometime. They live on the other side of the state from us, unfortunately. I just love DC for the opportunity to see other minister that we only see one time a year, generally.

The ordination service was wonderful and I really appreciated the sermon. Pastor Dave Williams spoke on how to plug into God’s power. It was a very useful sermon and it led into his leadership seminar very well, too.

So, all in all, it was a great council. The kids did really well sitting through all of that, too. It is hardest for Ella and she did great. I thanked her. We went to see the State Capitol after the Seminar on Thursday. I’ve never seen it and I have lived here a long time. It was great to get to see it and share the experience with the kids. I’m thankful for all the intercessors that prayed for us while we met. More prayer is what we need. We can always use more prayer!

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Feeling Appreciated

I think that all of us feel unappreciated on some days. Today is one of those days for me. Right now my family and I are on a mission to make ourselves feel appreciated. Chris isn’t feeling too great, either. It’s interesting how you can know in your head that you are appreciated and loved and not FEEL that way.

Just this morning, Ella told me she loved me and it was in that way that I knew she really meant it at that moment, that she was really feeling it just then. That made me feel nice, but I later found my purse soaked with milk from Ella’s spilt cereal. Then it was as if she didn’t say that at all. She hadn’t bothered to even try to clean up the mess. Her thoughtlessness hurt my feelings, but I knew in my head that it was just her being a normal 7 year old. And once I thought about it, I grasped at that loved feeling that I got when she told me she loved me earlier in the day. I decided that it was going to stay and I was going to make the feelings associated with the milk go away. I’d much rather be happy.

It helped that she thought of me again by suggesting to Daddy that they get me flowers and a balloon, which they did. I have a wonderful family. I had been thinking flowers would be nice. I was also wishing for an early Mother’s Day. I just needed it. And I got both! Chris later mentioned that it was like an early Mother’s Day and he was right! I got to choose where to go for lunch and what to do this afternoon.

We went and had pizza for lunch and we are now on our way to the zoo. It’s open early because of the nice weather we’ve been having. Not all the animals are out and the train isn’t running, but it will be fun and it’s free! Whee! Ella says I get to choose for dinner, too! We will be in Saginaw, so that opens up my options! I’m thinking Famous Dave’s right now.

The Five Love Languages book talks about how we need to keep our love tanks full. I feel that mine is on empty. I was trying to soak up love from Chris’ hugs, but I realized that it was not really possible. God must be my source of love. At least for a tank that stays full and especially when Chris is feeling empty as well. He can’t help me like God. I’m realizing lately that I must rely more on God for these things. I expect more out of Chris than is humanly possible. Really. Literally. God is the only one that can give me what I need. Just writing this, admitting it in writing, out loud, so to speak, gives me joy. I know I’m on the right track always growing and allowing God to stretch me. It’s good to be teachable and always learning.

While I was still sad, I told Chris that I felt that I had been giving love, but not receiving enough back. With our concern over Ella, I’ve been making a concerted effort to make sure she knows we all love her, including God. It is a rewarding, yet tiring job. I only wish I had noticed that her love tank was on empty sooner than I did. It is much harder to bring and keep recovery and wholeness now. I am seeing progress the last couple of days. She seems to see that I am there for here now. I wasn’t before, while I was escaping the world through the computer. But after many weeks of my focus on the right things, she is beginning to benefit. All I can say is, “Thank you God!”

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Praying In Color

My dear hubby bought me a great book recently. It is called Praying in Color: Drawing A New Path to God. It was written by Sybil MacBeth. There is also a Kids’ Edition. She talks about how she has difficulty focusing during prayer and how she discovered that this was effective for her. Then she writes about why and how it works. She has little tips throughout as well. The kids’ edition is a short, quick version of the original book.

I am generally overwhelmed by “deep” books at first. I much prefer the light reading of fiction. I am not sure why, but I generally have to take time before I decide to read something that makes me think. Chris bought both books for me and the kids. The longer one was intimidating, so I started with the kids’ edition. I read a few short chapters but then I started getting excited about the concept and switched. The kids’ edition broke the ice for me.

I would highly recommend these books if you are like either the author or me. I have a terrible time focusing. My mind, my hands, my body all want to move and move on. Thought after thought flood my mind when I try to pray. This way of praying is great for me because it’s just doodling! You don’t even have to think words, much less write or say them. You just focus on the person or whatever it is you are praying for and let your hand run wild. I do this same thing all the time when I am on the phone. I doodle all the time!

You can pray whatever kind of prayer you want. She even goes over how to use this method for lectio divina. I have prayed for myself, but I have also interceded for others, tried a little lectio divina and done a combination. The doodles are just that and don’t have to be prefect. They aren’t supposed to be. However, if you are like me, you will think your prayers are the most beautiful works of art you’ve seen when you are done with them.

Here is a prayer for my daughter. She is having some difficulty with school again. I think the troubles are both because she does have her own will, but also because she seems to be having self-esteem issues and other things that stem from that. I know that with God’s guidance she will pull through her difficulties, but she has really been on my heart and mind lately. I’ve also been reading another book lately that talks about saying blessings over people, so that is why I changed delicate to strong on the leaf. This particular prayer is more polished than most are, but it was just right that day!

My Strong Flower

Oh! And in case you wondered, the supplies I use are a Moleskine Pocket Sketchbook (I am currently using a Moleskine Cahier Plain Notebook because Chris had one when I started, but I will switch when that runs out. The marker goes through the tiniest bit, but won’t on the Sketchbook.) I use Sharpie Ultra-Fine-Point Permanent Markers. I bought the pack that is linked at Wal-Mart for 15 or 20 dollars. It was a bit spendy, but for this purpose, well worth top-notch supplies.

I hope this post will encourage someone to get the book and try this method of prayer out. I have been really enjoying it the last couple of weeks.

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My Lenten Journey

What a lent I had this year! It was a great, yet difficult learning experience. I finally realized just how much my constant computer use was effecting both my family and myself. Even now I am being careful of the time I spend on it. If I am engaged in a discipline (as my hubby puts it) then I can work on it during the day. All e-mail and “surfing” is now relegated to the hour after the kids go to bed. If i’m on during the day, I’m going to focus on just the one thing I got on to do. That should help me be more productive as well.

I have gotten a lot more things accomplished these past few weeks. I got about half of my kitchen cupboards painted. I can’t wait to get them done, but with my back problems, I have to take it really slowly. I’ll get it done eventually. I’ve also had a lot more fun with my kids. We have done more crafty things and more cuddling. I have worked to help Princess feel more loved in general. She needs lots of love, just like me. She wasn’t getting much from me before.

The kids were used by God to show me my obsession. They kept telling Chris and I how unhealthy we were always being while on our computers. My mom’s computer recently broke and now she has Chris’ computer on loan. So that should also help me use mine less. Chris has a good reason to use the computer with his classes. He is almost done with his masters! He’s graduating on May 15th. Strangely, his last class isn’t done until the end of May, though.

We had a great Easter yesterday and now it is spring break for the kids. I’m super excited for tomorrow because Chris has to go on his last retreat for his masters. Quarterly retreats are one of the requirements. He’s taking me along for a romantic retreat! We so rarely get any time alone! My mom is babysitting the kids which should be nice for everyone. We are going to go to a bed and breakfast we went to our first Christmas together. We’ve tried to make the plans, but with the holiday, they aren’t quite set in stone yet. We have several backup plans, though. So, we leave tomorrow one way or another. I CANNOT wait!!!

Well, I feel kind of rambly, but I wanted to get something down while I felt like writing. Now I need to make sure this gets posted to Twitter and then Facebook. Then I’m off for the day!

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Why Elaine isn’t on the internet.

Elaine has been fasting from the internet, so I am posting this for her. It is exciting to see what God is doing in her durring her fast. Stay tuned for renewed blogging zeal when she returns. Here is an excerpt from a sermon she gave telling about her decision:

I did not fully realize what was going on, but God guided me to the realization that for the past 3 years I have slowly grown more addicted to the internet. Last fall, I heard about a place for people to go to recover from addiction to the internet and computer. I chuckled at the thought. I knew there could be addiction to anything, but at that time, I didn’t really take it seriously.

It started out as a coping mechanism for depressed feelings. While I was on the internet, I could forget everything I was feeling about myself. It has recently been total isolation of myself from my life and family.

My in-laws expressed concern in September and I didn’t believe that it was so bad. I fought against the idea that I was allowing it to control me. At Christmas, we talked about it again. Chris knew the truth, but was patiently waiting for the Holy Spirit to bring me to place where I could accept it. He stood up for me with his parents because I had been trying to control my internet use while I was there.

Since then, God has been showing me how much I was letting it control me. Finally, about 2 weeks ago, God convinced me to fast the computer for a day. One day without any computer at all. I felt like I had lost my lifeblood. It was a ridiculous feeling. I knew it wasn’t right to feel that way about a silly computer. Computers are good tools, but bad constant companions.

I was missing so much by retreating into my computer. That day of fasting was enlightening. I was so much more aware of my surrounding and my family. I laughed, really laughed like I hadn’t in a very long time. I enjoyed my children. I saw them. I saw that they needed me. They needed a mom not a person attached to a computer called mom who didn’t do much mothering at all.

That night I made the decision to wait until 8 pm the next day to get on the computer and internet. I decided to do that from that point on. I would not use it while the kids were around. That went well for a few days, but still I was trying to control myself and not letting God control me. That first night that I went back to using the internet at night, the kids were not going to sleep when they should have been and I got very angry with them. It was an irrational anger. That made me realize that I was like a drug addict who needed her fix. My drug of choice is the internet I suppose, which is no better. Exodus 20:3 says, “”You shall have no other gods before me.” I was upset that the kids had dared to interrupt my time with my computer. I disgusted myself with that realization!

I have asked forgiveness, but I must give my computer and it use to God. I must let God control me instead. That is a daily battle.

Right now I am again fasting (and I only tell you this because it is so appropriate to the sermon). I feel I need to see what life can be life without an addiction. After that, I will lay down some ground rules for the computer and try to use it mostly for work. I have a battle ahead of me, but I am no longer hiding from God, but with Him. He is now my hiding place. The computer was not doing a good job of helping me cope because it is not meant to do that. God is.

God can free each of us from the sins that control us. None of us are exempt from the temptation to sin. We are sinful beings who can only be clean through God’s forgiveness. Take the time before communion to examine yourself through God’s eyes, he’ll help you see what needs to be forgiven and changed. He’ll even help you change it. If you would like prayer, please let us pray for you, either while communion is being served or later whenever you are ready. I covet your prayers as I wage war on my addiction.

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Writing

Writing. I haven’t felt like really writing anything for a long time. Even now I’m surprised that I want to write. It may be a fleeting thing. I may not even finish this whole post in order to post. This is year has again been crazy. My family has been diagnosed with Sleep Apnea. Chris has a moderate case. He wakes up 19 times an hour because he stops breathing. I wake up a mere 6 times an hour. Our daughter wakes up 2 times and our son wakes up 1 time per hour. That might not seem like much, but it causes our sleep to be interrupted and explains why we are all groggy during the day. Chris and I have been put on CPAP machines. It has worked wonders for Chris. He gets up in the morning instead of noon every day. I have had success, too. However, I think now that I am taking too much medication. I have good days, but I also have days where I feel worse than before. I can’t think straight and I want to stay in bed. So, now I am going to try to get off of all of my depression medications.

I have to say that is scares me a lot. I have tried before and it has not gone well. The side effects of going off of the medicine are worse than the depression. I found a program online that helps you to get off without side-effects. It is free, but you do have to buy the needed supplements. It’s called The Road Back. I would like to try it, but I need to come up with the $160-$200 to buy the supplements.

While waiting for God to provide the money for that this past week, Chris reminded me of a time that I felt God had healed me. I think I figured out why I wasn’t just done with everything then. I remember feeling that God was telling me to flush the medicine. And I was scared because of the side effects. I didn’t do it. I think that was my mistake. Now I wonder, if I can have a second chance. I feel like maybe God is saying, “Sure, if you can really believe.” But, can I? I can allow the fear to ruin things again! But am I hearing correctly? Maybe I will fast to try to find out.

As far as the kids go, they will be seeing a specialist tomorrow to see about an Adentonsillectomy. They will remove their tonsils and adenoids so that they can breathe better at night. I guess that if they have this done, it should help them to grow out of it. If you are a mouth breather as a child, your tongue can’t do its job to expand your palette and jaw. The narrower your jaw the more chance you have of having Sleep Apnea. Your tongue pushes your teeth apart in your sleep. I found that pretty interesting. I am a mouth breather, so I imagine that is what happened with me. I’ve also had 4 teeth and 1 wisdom tooth removed. I could really use the rest of my wisdom teeth removed because my jaw isn’t big enough and now my teeth are getting out of align again. I had braces in high school, but am losing all the benefits. The sleep doctor told us that we all have narrow jaws. Sleep Apnea can also be genetic. So, I guess our kids didn’t have much of a chance, anyway. Poor kids!

In other news, with all of this going on, I have had a hard time making myself preach. I’m sure I’ve mentioned before how I don’t enjoy preaching and hope that one day I will look forward to it. I always have difficulties when I have medicine changes (which is what is basically happening since I added the CPAP. It’s like I increased my other meds.). I have difficulty caring about anything. I don’t want to do the things I enjoy doing and it is almost impossible to make myself do things I don’t like to do. We have been late getting the kids to school a lot this school year. And that explains some of why I haven’t been blogging, as well.

I have been extra busy with scrapping duties, however. That is my escape right now. I was a guest on Nicole’s creative team (CT) in March. Now I am on The Digichick site CT. I am enjoying it a lot. There are so many good designers. But, I haven’t even kept up with posting layouts on my scrap blog.

I pray that this all ends soon and quickly. There is an update for you. I hope to not be such a stranger, but don’t count on it!

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Now for a fun meme!

First is a one word meme. Both of these are from a friend that I’ve had since sixth grade, Monkey Memories.
1. Where is your cell phone? nowhere
2. Where is your significant other? Couch
3. Your hair color? Red
4. Your mother? Bay City
5. Your father? Heaven
6. Your favorite thing? Chocolate
7. Your dream last night? (shrug)
8. Your dream/goal? Cleanliness
9. The room you’re in? Family
10. Your hobby? Scrapping
11. Your fear? Spiders
12. Where do you want to be in six years? Here
13. Where were you last night? Couch
14. What you’re not? Caught-up
15. One of your wish list items? Digital SLR
16. Where you grew up? Everywhere
17. The last thing you did? Laughed
18. What are you wearing? Clothes
19. Your TV? Memorex
20. Your pet? Gerbils
21. Your computer? Mac
22. Your mood? Unsure
23. Missing someone? Isaac
24. Your car? Van
25. Something you’re not wearing? Socks
26. Favorite store? Target
27. Your summer? Gone
28. Love someone? Many
29. Your favorite color? Blue-green
30. When is the last time you laughed? Now
31. Last time you cried? Days
For the second meme, I am supposed to post the 6th picture in my sixth album! I’m going with the sixth picture in my newest folder because I want to show off my new nephew!

I’ve no idea who to tag. I don’t like tagging people. I feel like I’m making them do something they don’t want to. Of course, I can’t really make them do anything, but still, just because I want to do a meme doesn’t mean anyone else does.

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Poverty: Blog Action Day

Today is Blog Action Day and the theme is Poverty. I read a great post by Travis already. You should check it out.

I recently had a conversation with a friend/relative. She said that Hubby and I inspired her with our kingdom living. She said that she sees that we live for eternity and not for today. She and her hubby want to be that way, but it is hard. I was honored that she sees us that way. We struggle everyday to live with what we have and not constantly desire more. We give away at least 20% of our income, but we try to give even more when we can. However, we don’t always succeed. I told her that, too. Right now we are in a bad spot because we wasted some extra money we had. If we hadn’t wasted it, we could have gotten ourselves out of that bad spot. It’s so easy to go on a spending spree when you’ve gone so long scrimping and then have some extra cash. But God forgives our mistakes. I asked Him to forgive me for my wastefulness and even causing Chris to be wasteful, too. I know He has forgiven me, but He also gently reminded me that while we wasted our opportunity to easily get out of a mess, He is still there for us. We have to pay the consequences of our wastefulness, but He will provide. He will make it possible to get out even though it may be harder than it could have been. Does that make sense?

I’ve actually been thinking a lot about poverty. Maybe we all have. Finances are bad for everyone right now. I think even the rich feel it in their pocketbooks. A few years ago I went to the Philippines. Lately I’ve been wishing that we lived more like they do. They have small houses that are cement if they are fortunate enough. Most have thatch roofs. They do their laundry by hand and walk to most places. They also have many people living in one house together. Our country has become one of so many independent people that when we face a crisis like this financial one, we don’t know what to do. We have become so independent that we have no one to turn to when we do need help.

So many of us live so far from our families that we don’t have the crucial family support we need. I, for one, live in a rural area and I have few ways to save gas money. I work 25 miles away from my house. Even to go to the grocery store is far. If I want to go to Target or Wal-Mart, I have to drive 45 minutes. As a nation, we are far too lazy. I say that it’s far to the grocery store, but really, I could walk there if I had to. And I should. I should save some money and get exercise.

I read an article recently titled,”I Live With Another Man’s Wife“. It is about four couples who live together. It was in issue 35 of Relevant Magazine. If you click the link, there is a summary of the article in the left column about half way down. I wish they had the entire article online, it was very good. These four couples save money by eating together and taking turns cooking. Their bills are less because they are split between the four families. They even have kids. They each have their private space, but otherwise all is shared, including work. I’ve been thinking that that is pretty smart. It is way more economically responsible. It’s also more financially and environmentally responsible. What would it take to get there, I wonder?

With the all the financial pressure that we are all feeling lately, with higher gas, food and other bills, we really need to take steps toward a better solution. Sure it is hard to live with other people and sure it is hard not to spend money you don’t really have. But in the end, we are way better off doing these fairly simple things to save ourselves from more serious problems.

Take a look at this very funny video from Saturday Night Live, Don’t Buy Stuff You Cannot Afford. I received a link to it via Twitter today, but I can’t figure out who from. Thank you to whoever you were!

Finally, here is another great post for Blog Action Day, by iChilly, talking about the action responsibility we have. So, take these thoughts and act on them! Let’s start the necessary change we need to live more responsibly. This will benefit ourselves and others because there will be more of everything to go around. Like iChilly wrote,  let’s not be selfish “Because selfishness is poverty of the soul.” I would rather be poor in “stuff” than poor in “soul”.

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Our Unfathomably Merciful and Generous God

Matthew 20:1-16: The Kingdom of Heaven is like this… Opening: Romans 11:33-36: O the depth of the riches of both the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and unfathomable his ways! For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who became his counselor? Or who has first given to him that it might be paid back to him again? For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be the glory forever. Amen. Fair. It’s a concept that we all learn early in life. I think that is especially true of those with siblings. This week we saw that Foster knows the concept. We replaced Ella’s toddler bed with a twin size. She kept sleeping half on and half off of her bed. I knew it was time. I wanted her to like the new bed, so I let her choose the paint color and what I was going to paint on it. It won’t come as a surprise that it is dark purple with a light purple princess crown with those fake gems glued onto it and pink flowers with gem centers. It turned out very cute. But someone else was a little jealous. He didn’t actually say, “It’s not fair!,” but he pouted and even screamed. At one point he was acting like he was only one or two. He wouldn’t come in the house unless mommy escorted him in. He wouldn’t eat his ice cream unless mommy sat by him. He wants a Lightning McQueen bed. And he wants it now, not when he gets bigger. He wants two days worth of mommy working on his bed and giving him that attention. It felt very wrong to him that Ella got a new bed painted how she liked, and he didn’t. Have you ever thought that it’s not really fair when people get saved days or even hours before they die? I have. Here I’m devoting my entire life to God, living every day out for Him to the best of my ability. Especially since as a pastor I have extra responsibility. And then these people live it up and then get saved just in time. I’ve always been glad for them, but I’ve also thought that they somehow got away with more. I don’t think like that any more. Actually, I think the opposite way. They are the ones missing out and I feel bad for them and want them to get saved whenever as long as they do at some point. But, I used to think that it wasn’t quite fair. That is what the morning workers were saying. This parable is showing us how much we think like that. The workers who started in the morning were saying: “It’s not fair! He worked only an hour and he gets paid for a whole day? If he gets paid that much, then I should get more. I don’t care what I agreed to. If I had known, I wouldn’t have agreed to that amount.” I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, God’s kingdom is crazy! But, it is good crazy. God is merciful and kind, forgiving and loving. The way that Jesus tells this parable is really great. He got everyone’s attention, reeled them in and then hit them with the twist. He told about an everyday situation. I read a great summarization of the literary qualities of this parable written by Roger Hahn. I made a few slight changes to the word order, but this is almost exactly what he wrote.

The opening verses of the parable reflect the way of life in Galilee at that time exactly. The listeners would have nodded in agreement at each detail of the parable as Jesus told of the hiring of workers and the agreements that the landowner made with each group. Even the fact that the manager had the job of paying the workers was part of the customs of that time. The familiarity of all these details enticed the listeners into the story. Everything was so familiar that they became emotionally involved in and committed to this story. The first “clue” of the surprise ending came when the landowner ordered the manager to pay first those who had come to work last. The custom was to pay those who had worked all day first so they could go home first since they would be the most tired. Thus, this unusual instruction alerts the listener to pay close attention. When those who had “signed on” at the last hour received a full day’s pay, a denarius, a murmur passed through the crowd of Jesus’ listeners. What would the rest be paid if those who worked only one hour received the full reward? Here we see Jesus’ purpose in having the landowner order the manager to pay those first. Everyone will see and will wonder. Everyone will see and will develop their own expectations of what the rest of the workers should be paid. By constructing the parable so that all the workers are paid the same, Jesus pushes every listener into a response. The nature of the response reveals a great deal about the heart of the listener. Will they rejoice with the workers who received a full day’s pay for one hour’s work or will they grumble with the workers who complained?

It is hard to be so involved in the story and not take a side. Jesus wanted them to react so that they could see what their reaction was, even evaluate their reaction and, hopefully, see how God was different and more loving than we can imagine.

Hahn also wrote, that “verses 13-15 explain the viewpoint of the landowner. He had done no wrong. The workers who worked all day received the denarius for which they had agreed. Everybody else received more, in some cases much more, than they had expected. No one received less than he had expected. As owner, the landowner had the right to be generous with some if he wished. Only the most perverse logic would refuse him that right.”

They couldn’t really argue with him because they had agreed whether they knew all the facts or not, they had agreed. Really, the facts were none of their concern. Jesus wanted to show God’s grace and generosity. He also wanted to answer Peter’s question from Matthew 19:27. Matthew 19:27-30:

Peter answered him, “We have left everything to follow you! What then will there be for us?” Jesus said to them, “I tell you the truth, at the renewal of all things, when the Son of Man sits on his glorious throne, you who have followed me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and many who are last will be first.

God doesn’t care about the how, when or why of people coming into His kingdom. The details do not matter. They are insignificant to Him. He only cares that they come. He wants to see each of us saved. None of us are better than anyone else. He doesn’t judge based on what we deserve, but based on His grace. Does God think any better of Ella because she got saved a year younger than I did when I was a child? No. He only wants to rejoice that there is one more soul saved. One more soul that he loves SO much that He sent his own son to die for her. It is the same with each of us. A.W. Tozer wrote, “Nobody ever got anything from God on the grounds that he deserved it. Haven fallen, man deserves only punishment and death. So if God answers prayer it’s because God is good. From His goodness, His lovingkindness, His good-natured benevolence, God does it! That’s the source of everything.” A.W. Tozer: The Attributes of God, 47. Another interesting detail of this parable is that the landowner continued to go out and search for workers. Did he really need workers for that last hour? We don’t know what Jesus was thinking. Maybe the landowner would have needed to get the harvest in that night. But maybe he was just concerned that there were other workers out there that needed to work so that they could feed their families that next day. So, he kept going to look. He wanted to bring all the stray workers in and give them work and pay. He wasn’t belittling them when he asked why they were standing idle. He was more surprised that he hadn’t found them sooner. Again, God is just like that. He searches for us and he sends those of us who are saved out to search for Him, as well. Only God know where each of us is both physically and spiritually. Through the Holy Spirit he works through everyone’s hearts to bring them closer to Him. He comes again and again to us, never giving up. Now that is grace and generosity. We are talking about the God of the universe here. He doesn’t have to do all that for us. We are insignificant in the scheme of things, but we are not insignificant to Him. God’s greatness is a wonderful thing to sit and think about. We will never understand it all. God himself tells us that. Isaiah 55:8, 9 says, “My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Psalm 145:3 says, “Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom.” Job 11:7: Can you fathom the mysteries of God? Can you probe the limits of the Almighty? And Isaiah 40:28 says, “Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom.” However, regardless of the fact that we will never fully understand God, we must seek to understand all that we can. Another quote from A.W. Tozer:

“What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us. The history of mankind will probably show that no people has ever risen above its religion, and man’s spiritual history will positively demonstrate that no religion has ever been greater than its idea of God. Worship is pure or base as the worshiper entertains high or low thoughts of God. For this reason the gravest question before the Church is always God Himself, and the most portentous fact about any man is not what he at a given time may say or do, but what he in his deep heart conceives God to be like. We tend by a secret law of the soul to move toward our mental image of God. This is true not only of the individual Christian, but of the company of Christians that composes the Church. Always the most revealing thing about the Church is her idea of God.”

–A.W. Tozer, The Knowledge of the Holy (New York: HarperCollins, 1961), 1.

In other words, what we think we know of God is as much as we let God be. We must open up our minds to know more so that we can let God be God. For example, I believe that the reason we see fewer miracles and spiritual gifts is because we expect them less. We need to seek God for them. But if we think that God doesn’t do them anymore, then we aren’t seeking and, therefore, aren’t seeing them. Also, what we know of God is how we show God to the world. The better we know Him, the more accurate we are in that showing. If we do not know God well, we will be showing a poor image of God that may cause others to stray from God instead of to Him. God is a great and wonderful I am hoping my dear hubby can find an awesome video of this song to use during the service. “Indescribable” by Laura Story and Jesse Reeves

Indescribable! Uncontainable! You place the stars in the sky, And You know them by name; You are amazing, God! All powerful! Untameable! Awestruck, we fall to our knees As we humbly proclaim: You are amazing, God! Incomparable! Unchangeable! You see the depths of my heart And You love me the same; You are amazing, God!

Sources Used: http://www.religion-online.org/showarticle.asp?title=1527 http://www.pastorjeff.com/TozerPtoZ.html http://www.crivoice.org/biblestudy/bbmatt15.html http://www.biblegateway.com http://ryanedwinpaulson.blogspot.com/2008/04/w-tozer-quote.html http://www.westarkchurchofchrist.org/chadwell/1996/121596am.htm

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